I’m Still Here
When I started this blog it was as a fresh start. I had neglected my last blog, “Erotic Adventures” and I felt the need for a new beginning. Like everything in life when you start out you are full of idealistic zeal and this time is going to be better than last time etc etc.
Of course things never turn out the way you plan and I found myself not able to post here as often as I had hoped. Life got in the way and I found myself not posting at all for the last few weeks. I have really missed posting. The discipline of regularly sharing my musings with the world seems to keep me on track. I found myself constantly starting blog posts in my head, but not finding the commitment or time or focus to get them down on my iPad. But now I have a few things sorted and find myself ready to get back in the habit.
My life right now is in a state of flux. I don’t have a job as such and I find myself incapable of making a plan more than a day in advance. The main contributing factor to my lack of planning ability is the lack of employment certainty. Not having a fixed general direction makes it difficult to focus on details. I have always needed a plan to feel like my life is under control. Right now I don’t have a plan and it is unsettling. I really want a job and I have to keep reminding myself not to hold my lack of employment against the people who do have a job and make well meaning statements like “Don’t worry it will work out”. It will work out even if it doesn’t feel like it will right now.
On the plus side I have had time to myself which is not something I have had a lot of. My family and I had the opportunity to travel to Papua New Guinea on a cruise ship which was a surreal experience. I have also had the time to have another attempt at writing a novel as part of NaNoWriMo. I can’t report success unfortunately but I am well into a book which has promise. In the coming weeks I hope to share some excerpts with you all.
I have also had some time to explore my “Gemma-ness” which is having interesting results. I have begun a path of exploration with someone who has a mind very much like mine. Playing with someone who you click with so well is like wearing you favourite pair of comfy jeans and your most fabulous pair of 7 inch Pleasers at the same time. The jeans know every curve of your body and make you feel brave; but the shoes, while they look AAAMAAAZING, take every opportunity to remind you to tread carefully or you will break your ankle.
‘Pet’ in his own, slightly alcohol fuelled words, wants to “try everything so that I can decide if it is for me or not”. A little challenging but an interesting journey. I will make sure I share some of the juicier details along the way.
Re discovering Gemma has been interesting. Over the course of this year I had sometimes wondered if Gemma had completely died. I don’t think she has but I had not really realised how much of her I had cut off. I could ramble on about this but I think it needs to be the subject for another post.
So here is to a summer of writing, re-discovery and more than a little corruption.