Just No

I was recently at a swing club and encountered a man. That in itself is not unusual. It is in fact one of the things that Mr Jones and I go there for. The difference in this case is that I didn’t find him attractive. I knew this as soon as I saw him. Not only did I not find him attractive I also had some instinctive understanding that he wasn’t going to take no for an answer.

Throughout the evening I avoided eye contact with this man. I didn’t want to get into a conversation with him. I knew without experiencing it that he would be pushy and not listen to me when I avoided his advances. In short I just found him a bit creepy. I chatted with other men and found other people who were much more attractive to me.

Later I was in an open play area and I was enjoying myself with another man. He was sitting on a couch naked and I was kneeling in front of him with my mouth on his cock. It was hot, he was enjoying himself and I was enjoying myself. Two consenting adults enjoying themselves in a place where that kind of thing is allowed. I was aware of the creepy guy watching. It wasn’t ideal but it was a public space, he was entitled to watch. As long as he kept to himself.

Of course he didn’t. Creepy people never do. They are constantly trying to find a way to ease themselves into situations where they are not wanted or invited. I heard him asking Mr Jones if he was able to join in. Of course Mr Jones stated that I was in charge of that. I turned and clearly said no to him.

Undeterred he moved to be sitting on the couch a little way down from myself and my new friend. He pulled out his cock and began wanking. Not entirely the most acceptable thing but I ignored him. As long as he kept his hands to himself I was prepared to ignore his transgression.

As it happened Covid restrictions meant my new friend and I were directed to a closed room. I don’t know what the difference would be but hey, we adjourned and continued with our fun.

Later I was talking with the club security. He apologised for moving us. In pre-Covid times giving a man a head job in an open play area was the norm. These days rules say that kind of thing is not allowed. The club’s owners don’t like the rules or think they are sensible but they are also keen to avoid a fine and so enforce them. What was more of a concern to him was the behaviour of the creepy guy. It turned out that he was not prepared to overlook Creepy Guy’s transgression and was only to happy to evict him.

As I suspected he did not go willingly. He refused to understand that what he had done was not acceptable. No amount of explaining could convey why creepiness was not OK. To make matters worse he accused the security man of being racist. It is true that Creepy Guy was not Caucasian like myself, Mr Jones, our friend and the security man but that was not the reason why we found him creepy. He was just creepy.

At the end of the day no-one likes being rejected. It is unpleasant and can be painful. But pushing things can lead to situations where you have to hear even less pleasant things about yourself. If a person says No it really is best to just accept it and walk away.

This post is part of Wicked Wednesday prompt #441 Unrequited Love. Click on the image to see who else is being Wicked.

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Wife, swinger, blogger. An ordinary woman living life one day at a time dealing with the complications of moonlighting as a sex goddess.

21 thoughts on “Just No”

  1. He had it coming, as it sounds to me, as he didn’t accept your no, and acted in an unacceptable way. And then to throw it on race is even lower. He should at least have tried to understand what he did wrong so he could do better the next time.
    ~ Marie


  2. I like that most clubs have ways of controlling situations like this and protecting people from the “creepy guys.” The club we use to frequent had upstairs play and men could only go if they were brought by a woman.


    1. No the owner has been around for a long time. She doesn’t take crap from single guys. Even if they don’t get evicted they will still end up on the banned list if they don’t toe the line.

      Liked by 1 person

  3. I’m sorry that happened, while I LOVE how astute security is at that club. Very impressive.

    Creeps and scumbags are everywhere. A friend on Twitter told me last night she’s not posting anymore, as she keeps having followers creep out on her, making it a horrible experience 😦


  4. I’m so sorry this happened to you. I myself can remember a time at a BDSM club and an older guy came up to my husband and me and started talking about me like I was a cow at a cow at a cattle market, them made the mistake of grabbing my ass. I made a vocal scene about consent and the fact that neither my husband nor I had consented to him touching me and he was very sheepish. I have a great bond with the host and he was soon sent packing. These people are the minority, but sadly, they can still ruin what was otherwise a great night.


    1. Thank you for your concern. This guy was not as bad as some others I have seen. Sadly women can also behave badly and they often get away with it because of their gender.


      1. Oh yes, we had one woman on a other occasion who started hitting on my husband quite unexpectedly. I was sat right next to him, too. Neither of us have forgotten it. 99% of people in these clubs are decent and genuine, but there is always that 1%.


      2. Two things: (a) I think it is a terrible thing when someone doesnt have a concept of how they should conduct themselves (or even empathy) in a specific environment as this. I likened it to the one guy at a stripclub who oggles and says stupid creepo things to the bartender.
        (b) As per women’s behavior, I was in uniform at church years ago…got groped by a lady in her late 60’s. Yeah, it might have been a little sexier if she would have asked , while whispering in my ear, etc.

        Thanks to you and your readers for their candor. It is inspiring me to write about manners and decorum.


  5. Thanks for sharing this experinece. You are lucky to have a good instinct and sense creepiness before it happens. Also a good reminder only to go to clubs where this kind of behavior is getting rewarded with a kick out the door. xoxo


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