TMI Tuesday – What is Normal?

1. Do you consider your sex to be “conventional”? Why or why not?

I once heard a person describe married sex as saying “fuck you” at your partner as they pass you in the hallway. I am certain that many people think that is conventional sex for married couples. There are other people who consider legs in the air screaming the house down sex with a man you are not married to while your husband is tied to a chair and forced to watch conventional as well.

I personally don’t do the first option ever. While the second option is part of my repertoire it isn’t the only way I have sex. Sometimes vanilla is the best flavour.

2. Gender Identity–How do you describe yourself? (Mark one answer)

a. Male b. Female c. Trans Male/Trans Man d. Trans Female/Trans Woman e. Genderqueer/Gender Non­Conforming f. Different Identity

As far as gender goes I am a woman or a female. I respect people who have a high level of self awareness and emotional maturity and identify in a way that is non-binary. I also think that this whole thing has been overthought by a lot of people.

3. Sexual Orientation–Are you exclusively?

a. Heterosexual b. Gay c. Lesbian d. Bisexual e. None of the above, specify if you wish.

Sometimes I consider myself to be bisexual but in all honesty I think I am more of a pansexual. Because I love getting down and dirty with a pan.

And a man

And a woman

If they are appealing to me.

4. Is understanding the causes and effects, and the formation of gender stereotypes important?

There is no substitute for education. It is absolutely important for people to understand that gender stereotypes exist, their effects and where they come from. This doesn’t have to be so that people who are applying these stereotypes can be vilified or made to fee lesser but so that everyone can address these issues.

Bonus: Your thoughts on this–“I’m in a committed relationship, and it feels like asking for consent every time we have sex is overkill—is that wrong?”

If asking for consent is onerous and seems like overkill then you genuinely don’t respect the person you are with. Just because someone has been your spouse for twenty years does not mean that you have to consider that they may not be as interested in sex as you think.

2 thoughts on “TMI Tuesday – What is Normal?

  1. 1. I consider my sex to be largely conventual, but have pushed the boundaries on occasions with selected partners. Married sex in my experience has been a journey that started on a high and went downhill from that point due to external pressures, laziness and miss matched libidos. I enjoy sex in all its forms but definitely have a leaning towards the giver role.

    2. a. Male

    3. Sexual Orientation– Hetro-flexible. I love time with women, however in a couples or group situation I go with the flow (with boundaries). I do not actively seek MM encounters.

    4. I am happy to be aware but do not invest time understanding the detail. My position is to respect individuals based on their choices.

    Bonus: Your thoughts on this–“I’m in a committed relationship, and it feels like asking for consent every time we have sex is overkill—is that wrong?”

    My position is……Your body Your rules….I believe there has to be some form of consent at all times from all parties when it comes to sex.

    Liked by 3 people

  2. Gem, knowledge is power. Understanding where biases come from stereotypes can help me improve myself. I cannot make anyone else think differently but if we continue to offer alternative thoughts maybe we can help make change.

    Well said but then again those of us who follow each other are of a different mindset than many.

    Thanks for sharing your views.


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