TMI Tuesday – Long Showers and Lasagne

Image by Engin Akyurt from Pixabay

1. Shower or bath?

Water was an issue when I was a child. We lived on a farm and relied on rainwater and a bore for our water so long showers and deep baths were totally out of the question. That has imprinted on me. To this day I cannot do long showers or deep baths. I do treat myself to a long bath but probably only about once a month and I feel guilty about it almost every time. .

As an aside living on the yacht means VERY short showers. That means when we hit a marina a good long shower is one of the top priorities.

2. Are you a good cook? And if so, what’s your specialty?

I consider myself to be a good cook. Although I would qualify that by saying I am a good basic cook. I am excellent at putting together balanced meals from the vegetables in the fridge with minimal fuss. I don’t do elaborate meals with fancy garnishes, but the food that comes out of my kitchen will nourish you. The dish I cook that gets the whole family going is lasagna. True to form it comes complete with hidden vegetables but this removes the need for a side salad.

3. Is there anything you regret not doing?

Not really. My wedding is a big regret in my life because I let my mother control it far too much. I don’t know how I wanted it exactly which is probably why she was able to take control. But I look at weddings of friends and I am envious that they have their dream day while I feel like I had her day.

4. Who was the nicest person you worked for?

My current Mathematics Academic Leader is one of the most amazing generous patient people I have ever met. Even when he is correcting you it feels like a hug.

5. Do you play an instrument?

Presently I would say no. As a child I learned the piano and was reasonably proficient. These days I have so many other things in my life I don’t have the discipline to practice enough to restore the skill.

Bonus: Do you dream?

In vivid technicolor yes. About all sorts of things. Including sex dreams about men that are taboo.

TMI Tuesday the Fantasy Edition

1. Does your sex life need some fantasy? What kind of fantasy?

Tonight I feel as if I have been living a fantasy for the last few days. I am not exactly all sexed OUT but I am certainly sexed UP. Thank you Second Mate and Mr Jones. You have been awesome.

2. What is eroticism for you?

Many things. It can be a look. It can be the words whispered in your ear and sometimes it is laughing because your husband is struggling to video you peeing over the side of the boat.

3. You are invited to a kink party, will you go?

Erm yes!! I would be offended if I wasn’t invited.

4. Your lover has tied your naked body down. What do you want to happen next?
a. You get tickled mercilessly
b. You are covered in whip cream and people lick the cream entirely from your naked body
c. Bind, blind, and tease your erogenous zones with an ice cube, feather, candle wax, tongue, etc.
d. A sex toy is used to penetrate you to orgasm

I am going with C. Although I am not sure about the ice cube. Although in the last few days D has been more my experience.

5. In your sex life, do you go along with whatever your partner wants and needs or when necessary do you handle things to make sure you have thrilling sex?

I am a lot more compliant and tend to go along with what my partner suggests most of the time. It has led to some very exciting experiences.

Bonus: When is the last time you purchased a sex toy? What did you buy? Was it purchased online or at a store?

I purchased a small massager just before we left on our voyage. Like all my sex toys I purchase online. Unless you count the rope I purchased at Bunnings in Cairns!!

The Clit Sucking Vibrator

Once upon a time a sex toy retailer contacted a sex blogger about doing a product review. The sex blogger was very excited to be asked because she liked the opportunity to try out some toys that she hadn’t used before but she was worried because she was travelling and didn’t have a fixed address which made it difficult to deliver a physical product. The sex toy reviewer reassured the sex blogger that it didn’t matter and encouraged the sex blogger to choose a product.

So the sex blogger went to and chose a clitoral sucking vibrator from the website. The blogger was excited to try this type of Female Masturbator because it seemed more than the standard vibrator. Having a clit sucker that she could control seemed very appealing. Sohimi seemed like a great company and their prices were very competitive. The thing that bothered the sex blogger was that it seemed to be a US company which meant that delivery to Australia could take a while. The sex blogger had ordered some T-shirts from a US company earlier in the year and it had taken over six weeks for them to arrive. The Sex Blogger needn’t have worried really with forwarding and travelling the item still arrived much faster than the T-shirts!

The packaging was very discrete and the box was sturdy enough to keep the new sucking vibrator very safe. First impressions were good. The material that the vibrator was made of felt smooth and luxurious. The blogger was very intrigued by the sucking mechanism which on the first setting seemed soft but eight different settings of increasing intensity meant the right setting for each individual could be found.

In addition to sucking; the masturbator can also be used as a vibrator. The controls for the vibration intensity and patterns are separate from the sucking controls meaning any vibrating pattern can be used in conjunction with any sucking intensity. In total there are nine different vibrating patterns which can be used in conjunction with any sucking intensity.

The controls for vibrating are separate from the control for sucking. Both are easy to find and light up meaning they can be found in the dark. It is easy to change the settings while the toy is in use because the buttons are also raised making them easy to find and distinguish. The sucking head can be used both on the clitoris and on the G-spot. The angle of the head is flexible allowing it to be adjusted to different angles which adds to its versatility.

Later that night the sex blogger used her new toy. It was a very different sensation but the sucking alone on her clitoris was enough to push her to the edge. The sex blogger is very sensitive and the gentle sucking was very pleasant. With added vibrations it was just right for her.

The next night the sex blogger had a friend to visit. He was excited to play with her and the new toy. He enjoyed playing with the different settings and trying different combinations in different positions. The blogger found applying the sucker to her G spot with a little pressure on her pubis from the outside created an amazing sensation which resulted in some squirting. Squirting is not a new thing for the sex blogger but the toy was definitely effective in helping her achieve this.

One negative that The Sex Blogger’s friend noticed was the the flexible head didn’t stand up to pressure well and bent easily to a different shape when it was pressed against the Sex Blogger’s Vagina. He felt it was great to be able to adjust the angle but in some ways a more rigid toy would be better. However this could reduce the versatility of the toy.

The vibrator is light and easy to store and the magnetic USB charger is very convenient. Additionally the vibrator only takes an hour to fully charge. The charge lasts for over an hour of use.

The toy is fully waterproof and mostly easy to clean however the Sex Blogger is careful to use a cotton swab or cue tip to clean out the sucking mechanism as this could be a place where fluids and moisture could build up.

Overall the Sex blogger is very happy with her new toy and is looking forward to more sessions with it. She is definitely interested in investigating some of the other products from

This review was solicited by Sohimi and the product for review was provided free of charge.

This post is linked to this week’s Wicked Wednesday. To see who else is being wicked click on the button below.

Wicked Wednesday

TMI Tuesday – Money Money Money

1. Has money ever ruined a relationship for you?

Money is not something that I place great importance on. I am not hugely concerned about accumulating large amounts of money. Nor am I concerned particularly with spending large amounts of money. In fact I am appalled at the amount of money some people will spend on things like clothing, shoes and the like.

Consequently money has never been a feature of the discussions between myself and partners. Mr Jones is interested in business, economics and the general mechanics of making money. He has been successful in living a life that involves a minimal amount of debt and we are reaping the rewards of that now. We don’t fight about money. But really we don’t fight about anything.

2. Have you ever successfully negotiated a pay raise?

In short no. As I said in No 1 money is not a motivator for me. I have never chosen a job based on the amount of money it would pay. If I did I certainly would not have changed careers to become a teacher.

3. What piece of MONEY advice would you tell your younger self?

Don’t get in to debt if you can avoid it. If you can’t pay cash for a small item like a new car or new furniture, then don’t buy it.

4. Have you ever paid for sex or been paid for sex?


I was offered money once by a Twitter follower to visit his house and have sex with him. He was drunk and the amount he offered was insulting. He is one of the few people I have ever blocked on social media.

5. Are you hiding a financial secret?

Not really. I don’t have a secret account or a stash of clothing that I daren’t tell Mr Jones how much it really cost. There are a number of people, mostly the ones I work with, who wonder how much the yacht cost. I am always vague about it and answer something like “enough”. Yes I could have bought a house with the same money. But hey, right now it IS my house.

Bonus: Have you made someone smile today? If not, please take up the challenge and make someone smile.

Everyone loves boobs right?

Snapped by Mr Jones at a small island we stopped at for a stroll

Friday Flashback – Personal Development

From the vault of Erotic Adventures comes this little gem. It is happy to see the light of day again. I hope that you all enjoy it.

Josh hated training courses. The idea of sitting on uncomfortable chairs in small rooms with freezing air conditioning listening to boring presenters who didn’t have the first clue about what it was like to work in a real job in the real world just made him irritated. Even though his boss knew how he felt about training courses he still found himself sitting on an uncomfortable chair in a freezing room waiting for the presenter to turn up. His boss had given him some kind of line about everyone needing to complete a personal development activity for their annual review. In an attempt to warm himself up he got up and helped himself to the coffee sitting in the corner and then checked his watch, 8.30 am. He was surprised that he was the only person who seemed to turn up. “That would be right,” he thought, “I get stuck here in a stupid course and there isn’t even another person to talk to.” He wandered over to the desk and selected a chair just before a woman with flaming red hair walked through the door carrying a thick leather briefcase.

“Hello,” she greeted him before she made her way to the whiteboard at the front of the room. 

“Hello,” Josh replied, with his eyes glued to her ass as she bent over to look inside her briefcase. The fabric of her skirt stretched enticingly over her full round butt. “It doesn’t look like there are many turning up this morning,” he continued, unsure of what else to say.

The presenter turned to face Josh. He had to remind himself to keep his mouth closed as she walked towards him. The neckline of her blouse stretched open to display full round breasts that looked like they were about to fall forwards. Stopping in front of him she leaned forward on the desk until Josh could almost see her nipples. “That is OK,” she smiled at him. “I prefer small intimate groups.” As if it was the most natural thing in the world she slipped her butt onto the desk in front of him. “So,” she continued, completely business like. “Today is all about your personal development and pushing your boundaries,” her voice dropped slightly as she leaned forward and touched the side of his face, letting her finger trail down the side of his neck, “Tell me about some of your boundaries Josh.” 

Suddenly it seemed as if Josh’s pants were not big enough for his cock, “Uh I don’t know,” he stammered fidgeting in his chair, trying to find a position that put less pressure on his throbbing cock. In front of him the presenters fingers nimbly popped open a couple of buttons on her blouse to reveal a very low cut bra and even more of her impressive cleavage. “What kinds of boundaries were you meaning?” 

“Well this course is about personal development,” the woman replied as she continued to unbutton her blouse. Even though Josh had been freezing earlier he suddenly felt hot. “So I was thinking personal type boundaries,” The woman slipped off the desk and stood in front of him, “like taking your clothes off in front of a stranger.” To emphasise her point she shrugged out of her blouse and let it slide to the floor, “Have you ever done that Josh?”

Josh fidgeted, not sure where to look.  “No,” He replied quietly unable to take his eyes off her breasts.

“Would you like to?” The woman reached behind her waist and Josh heard the sound of a zipper before her skirt started sliding down over her hips. 

“Maybe,” he replied glancing towards the door.

She followed his gaze, “It is OK,” her voice was comforting, “I made sure it was locked so that we wouldn’t be disturbed,” the skirt joined the blouse on the floor. She looked so tempting standing there in front of him in her underwear.

On an impulse Josh stood up and began unbuttoning his shirt. “What the hell!” he grinned as he shrugged out of his shirt and followed suit with his jeans. He stood before her with his cock straining against his boxers unsure of what was going to happen next but determined to be open to whatever came his way.

Taking a step forward the woman reached out and stroked his cock through his boxers. Josh held his breath, wondering when he was going to wake up. It had been so long since a woman had touched him there that he was sure that this had to be a dream. The woman slipped her hand under the waistband of Josh’s boxers and curled her fingers around his shaft. “So you haven’t answered my question,” she moved her hand slowly up and down and Josh began to wonder if he would be able to contain himself, “Do you have any boundaries?” She moved until she was close enough that Josh could feel her breath on his neck. He shuffled his feet as her hand slid down over his testicles cupping them gently before continuing further back towards his ass crack.

Josh felt his butt cheeks tighten as her fingernails scratched the skin behind his testicles. His cock throbbed in response, taking him completely by surprise. Her fingers slid further back, towards the forbidden zone. The place that he had always maintained was outwards only, except in the deepest darkest corners of his fantasies, ever since he had seen that image. Her finger stroked around his asshole tantalising him. His body betrayed his mind, opening itself up to her caresses even as his mind screamed out to tell her to stop.

For the first time he noticed her eyes, the glittering lust he saw there. “I will stop any time you tell me to Josh,” she whispered. “But until you say stop I am going to keep on exploring,”

“I don’t want you to stop,” Josh was stunned to hear his own voice say those words. 

She pulled away from him slightly and reached out for the waist of his boxers. “Maybe we should get rid of some barriers then.” She slipped the garment down over his hips freeing his cock. “Mmmm,” she bent down and tasted him briefly,” Josh moaned sharply, alarmed that he would shoot jizz into her mouth and spoil the moment but she released him. “I do like sausage but I am after more exotic fare today.” 

Quietly she moved to stand beside him, running her hands down his naked back to cup his butt before she slipped her finger lower to caress his butt hole. Josh took a deep breath as she smeared some lube and slipped her finger inside him. Sensation exploded through him as she moved her finger gently in and out. His cock was like a rock in front of him and he couldn’t stop himself from gripping his own shaft.

“That’s it,” the woman’s voice whispered in his ear. “Relax and enjoy the moment.” 

Josh nodded, frowning in concentration as sensations he never imagined possible sizzled through his body. The woman pushed her body against him, rubbing her crotch against his thigh as she finger fucked his ass. Josh’s head was spinning with pleasure.

“Would you like more?” her voice interrupted him. 

“Yes please.” He heard himself say.

She removed her finger and there was a pause before he felt the cool pressure of something else opening him more. He pushed back against the implement eagerly, still surprising himself with how much he wanted this. There was a moment of slight discomfort and then the pleasure ripped through him. His hand gripped his cock hard as she fucked his ass spreading him further than he thought would be pleasurable.  His whole body tingled and he felt something building. It was like an orgasm but at the same time not. Before he could stop it he exploded, groaning as cum covered his fist. His whole body spasmed in pleasure before he collapsed forward on the desk still twitching with aftershocks. Feeling completely dazed he turned his head towards the woman, She sat on one of the chairs with both of her feet up on the desk. Still recovering Josh watched as she fucked herself with a thick pink dildo. Her fingers moved quickly on her clit as the pink plastic moved in and out of her slippery wet cunt. 

Her movements became more frantic as Josh watched until her mouth formed a perfect O and her body arched out of the chair. As she relaxed and slumped into her chair a huge smile spread across her face. “Well done,” she congratulated him as she came back to life. “I think we can definitely say you have pushed a boundary or two today.”

What’s in a Name

I started writing erotica sometime around 2010. Our family had just returned from a three month caravan trip through the wilds of South and Western Australia and the Northern Territory. During that time I used a blog as a way of sharing my adventures with family and friends. My romance with the written word began….

Upon our return I started writing erotica based on the adventures I was having as part of my swinging journey. I didn’t have the confidence to go blazing ahead with a blog at first. I tested the waters by posting one of my stories on the dating website we use. Given that the audience was a bunch of people looking for other people to have sex with it was well received. I looked further afield and discovered Literotica.

It was there that I honed my skills of writing by using some of their help articles and later with the assistance of a volunteer editor. While writing there I used the pen name Babeslady, which is a play on the name Mr Jones uses for me and my actual name. It was in those early days I wrote a story about an adventure I had with Mr Jones that involved another woman he saw for a little while. She and I co-wrote the story. For this story I had to give myself a name. For no other reason than I liked it, I chose Gemma. Because I liked it, it became the name I used when I did start a blog a short while later. The second name Jones just seemed to fit. I didn’t know there is a British Actress of that name until I had already set up my first blog and Twitter account. It was too late then.

Gemma Jones Picture

So that was how I became Gemma Jones. I use the name for most things on the net associated with my lifestyle. When I talk to potential lovers online I introduce myself as Gemma. Some of them learn my real name, some of them work it out for themselves, some of them are none the wiser. It honestly doesn’t matter. In my mind Gemma is almost a separate person from the everyday woman who gets up, goes to school, teaches a bunch of teenagers and then comes home to make dinner and watch TV. Gemma is an adventurer who posts pictures of her body online and writes stories that excite and arouse.

In my current blog when I refer to my adventurous life I speak about Gemma, when I speak about my mundane life I refer to myself as Mrs Jones. It helps to keep my mind straight although I am sure there is more crossover than I realise. May Moor, in her post on this topic, states that she “has become so comfortable in May’s shoes (wellies actually) that I see us as one” As I read that statement I found myself nodding. Even though there is a delineation between Gemma and Mrs Jones we are really just two sides of the same coin.

I wish the world was such that we didn’t need to hide parts of us from conservative, small minded people. But it is not. And so until I retire and no longer need to appear to conduct myself in a socially acceptable way Gemma will be that delicious part of me that comes out for special people.

This post is part of this week’s 4 Thoughts or Fiction prompt #169 Pen name. Click the image below to read some other entries.


TMI Tuesday – Would You Rather?

1 Would you rather go on holidays to the beach with no bathers or in the mountains with no jacket?

I did mostly write the questions this week but I never really consider the answers when I do that. There are some obvious loopholes here. Nude beach is fun, as long as everyone else with you is nude which isn’t the case in most places. Mountains can be comfortable without a jacket as long as the weather is agreeable and there is good shelter with a fire at night. But if I had to choose which one I would risk I am going with beach and no bathers. At a pinch I could go swimming in my undies right? They would cover more than swimmers most of the time.

2 Would you rather not be able to eat chocolate for a year or have to eat your least favourite vegetable every day for a month?

Image by WikimediaImages from Pixabay

I am in a phase of trying to eat more whole plants and less processed foods. It is a process and some days go better than others. I really don’t like Kale. Although I am OK with its cousins, cabbage, broccoli and cauliflower. Could I eat it every day? Maybe. I think it would be better than a year without chocolate.

3 Would you rather only be able to have sex for five minute increments on any given day or only be able to have sex for five hour increments for the rest of your life?

Five hours is a long time to have sex. Although I have done it. Most of my play sessions last between 2 and 3 hours but they are becoming fewer and further between these days. If it was only for a year I would choose five minutes at a time. But my partner better be around every day!

4 Would you rather not be allowed to touch your partner’s genitals except with your own or have the reverse applied to them?

I love touching a man’s cock with my fingers, my mouth, my breasts and my feet if the situation calls for it. I don’t think I could do with out that.

5 Would you rather go on a hike barefooted or spend the day at a water park fully clothed?

A couple of years ago we spent a few days on a yacht in the Whitsunday Islands. During our trip we hiked up a relatively large mountain. Mr Jones and I were wearing beach shoes which really are not proper shoes and definitely not suitable for hiking. The Unicorn was with us and she hiked barefoot, much to the amazement of anyone we met along the track! Given that experience I am going to go with clothes at a water park. Who says I have to get them wet!

Bonus: Would you rather receive an alert every time your parents have sex or have your kids alerted every time YOU have sex?

I have a feeling that our kids know when we have sex most of the time. Given that we are very bad at closing the bedroom door and they insist on living here! It embarrasses them more than us probably. The Unicorn is very aware of Mr Jones’ and my lifestyle and so knows where we go and why I own so much sexy gear. So they can know when we have sex. We are modelling a healthy relationship.

This post is part of TMI Tuesday for February 21. Click on the image below to see who else is sharing.

TMI Tuesday – Randomness

1.What is the dumbest thing you are reading and writing right now?

Social media of course!!!. In particular a post from a friend, who I thought was intelligent, about a fashion show for ducks featuring images like this.

Image may contain: flower and outdoor

I am sorry but this seems to be something that needs to be said repeatedly.

CLOTHES ARE FOR PEOPLE!!!. If your dog looks happy to be wearing the new outfit you bought him it is because dogs are pathologically geared to make their owners happy. If you are happy because of something they did their world is complete. Did anyone ever see a cat that was happy about being dressed up? No. That is because cats are smarter!

Cats Dressed Up As Other Animals | Cat dressed up, Pet costumes, Cat  costumes

2.If you were to start your own country who would sing the national anthem?

Ultimately I would like Freddy Mercury to write my national anthem because Queen wrote such amazing anthems. But I guess I would have to settle for Adam Lambert.

Cassette Of Queen + Adam Lambert's Live Around The World For Release

3. If your were to be eaten by an animal of your choice (and you will die), what animal will eat you? Why?

There is a video kicking around the internet featuring Steve Irwin on “Late Night With Conan O’Brien” telling a story of a close call with a reticulated python which is about 20ft long. The story kicks in around 3:40 but watching someone so quintessentially Australian and completely natural with a prim proper American talk show host is freaking hilarious!

So me? Well it seems I spend a bit of time poking around with snakes. Mainly because they want to eat my pets. Not that any of those would be able to eat me but maybe one day I will stumble across one of these big things.

Honestly I think it wouldn’t be a bad way to go. Pythons do give you a big hug and make sure you are dead before they eat you so it wouldn’t be that bad. Plus, snakes are cool.

4. What word makes you smile?

Sixty – Nine. Childish I know but I work with teenagers. What can I say?

Sixty-nine: The history of a number - The Trail

5. What word makes you cringe

I stopped in the middle of writing this post because this one stumped me. Many ideas make me cringe but the mere mention of the word making me cringe? I have to say ‘moist’. Again, I work with teenagers. A few years ago this word was like any other. Then I had a special student in my year 8 Science class and I had to teach this particular class about human reproduction…..

Bonus: Will you board the love train?

So I had to Google this because I didn’t realise it was an actual song! The song is not exactly my type of thing which is probably why I have never heard it. Weirdly when I read the question a Seekers song called Morningtown ride popped into my head. Same era (maybe a little bit earlier judging by the pants the O’Jays wore!!) but completely different sentiments. Still can’t go past Judith Durham’s vocals though.

So which train will I be on? Really hard to say. Getting loved up with people all around the world isn’t my cup of tea, although I do appreciate the need for us to be kinder to each other. Hopping in to bed to spend the night dreaming away is very tempting some days but not as much as it was when I was the mother of toddlers!

I think I will just need to make my own train, fill it with sexy people and spend the journey getting to know each other.

This post is part of TMI Tuesday for December 29. If you enjoyed it please make sure you click here or on the image below for more TMI goodness.

My Life As A Male Escort

I have become an avid reader of Howie’s diary posts in Elliott’s blog. Like many people I am fascinated by the world of sex workers. In the mainstream world the way their work runs is largely unknown and I love the perspective Howie gives. In my travels into the world of alternative sex I came across a very rare thing. A man who had worked as an escort. It was exciting to get a glimpse into a profession that many people don’t realise exists. I thought that some of what he had to say would be great to share with you guys.

I met Roman through a dating website. While he is still quite virile and active in the adult dating scene he no longer works as an escort. Which, in my opinion, is a great loss for some women. Gain for me though. He agreed to share some of his ideas and experiences with me for my blog for which I am very grateful. The answers to my questions are as follows. I have tried to keep the words as close as possible to what he said but there may be some paraphrasing.

How long did you work as an escort?

Three years

How old were you while you were working?

46 – 49

Did you work for yourself?

I was a sole contractor. The laws in Queensland (Australia) do not allow sex workers to have drivers, security guards or operate in partnership with another sex worker. Laws regarding advertising are stringent and also include not allowing a sex worker to legally employ a web designer to create their website. There are different laws regarding brothels which employ women. There are also regulations about the number of hours a sex worker can operate etc. During the time I was working I believe that I was contacted several times by people who were testing me to make sure I was legitimate and following the required regulations.

How did you find clients?

Clients came to me. I was able to advertise on certain websites and also with Google words. It was very important for me to be quite clear with my advertising that I was only interested in female clientele.

What were the mechanics of the work; prices, meeting places etc?

The prospective client would email me through the website I used or text me. I had a separate phone that was used only for my work. I had some screening in place to make sure the client was genuine, and as mentioned above, female looking for a male. The prospective client would need to send through photos and go through a verification process ( I was never able to find out how this worked). We would chat for about a week or so before the client would decide if the arrangement was suitable. Often it would take time for them to clear their nerves and get used to the idea that they were paying for sex.

The pricing structure was as follows;

$800 – Sex. Meet at the client’s house or hotel that they had booked and paid for for three hours

$1500 – Date Experience. The client would pay the money in cash up front. Roman would organise everything for the evening; restaurant, hotel, transport. During the lead up to the date Roman would discover the type of food they liked, the type of music they liked and how they liked to dress. He would pick her up and take her to a restaurant the he had organised, buy her drinks, order food that they would share together and be very attentive. Because the age difference between them was not usually noticeable the women were able to feel like they were on a real date. Following the meal they would spend time in their hotel.

$3000 – Overnight boyfriend. This was similar to the Date Experience but involved his company for the entire night including breakfast the next morning.

The key to the success of the date was in getting the woman to relax. Keeping the conversation focussed on them and things they were interested in meant that the sex later would be memorable for them.

That is the reason for so much planning. I would keep notes based on the initial conversation and also after the first date. If the client returned then I would be able to refresh my memory so that I could keep that feeling of being focussed on her.

Did you have regular clients? If so what was the average time they stayed with you?

About 25% of my business was repeat customers. On average women would revisit after about four months. It would take them that long to get over the shame of using an escort. The pattern they would usually follow would be dinner date, dinner date, sex followed by overnight.

What types of women did you see?

Mostly professional women, teachers, nurses, real estate agents. They fell into two categories. One was single professionals who were tired of the dating scene. They wanted to have an arrangement where they didn’t have to think and put up with other people’s schedules. They could organise things to suit themselves.

The second category were women from broken relationships who had been treated badly. They often had no self esteem and no confidence in themselves. Sometimes I felt like I was a therapist who was building their confidence back up.

Did you have favourite clients?

Two stand out in my memory. The first was a woman who had a particular fantasy about a man who resembled me. Her friends arranged for me to visit her for her birthday. I was at her house for about twenty five minutes before she said she had enough and asked me to leave. I never saw her again and I believe that the whole thing was about revenge.

The second was a woman who was very attractive and successful. She liked to role play that they were a couple who were genuinely in love. She was able to relax enough with me that she could climax for the first time. During later dates I was able to make her squirt and she even experimented with anal.

Side note: Roman is NOT a small man in the cock department. This woman is braver than I ever was.

She also wanted to try water sports. I was very reluctant to do this and was worried that I would not be able to perform. It turns out that she also relaxed me enough that I could pee on her for a very long time.

Did you have any bad experiences?

I was very careful about meeting people. I would chat for long enough to know that it was going to work. During the vetting process the clients would have to explain why they were hiring and what their personal situation was. It helped me to be sure that things would work out.

What were some of the things you enjoyed about this job?

I enjoyed being able to make women feel attractive and as if they deserved to be treated well. I never thought any of my clients were unattractive. Certainly they were not movie stars. They had curves and squishy bits but many of them were mothers and had lived lives that involved building a family and a career. They had earned their bodies. Their husbands who had earned their fat guts by drinking beer and sitting on their arse did not have the right to tell these women they are fat.

It makes me happy to be a gentleman, to open doors and to do ‘old school’ things. Some of my clients did not like that but most of them did.

How did your work change the way you see men?

I was saddened by men who were not able to respect the women in their lives. I believe very strongly that women should be revered. Mothers have the highest status in my view. It makes me sad and angry that men use criticism and negative talk to keep a woman “in her place”

Did your feelings about your work change over time?

The stories about men mistreating women started to get to me. Ultimately that was the reason I stopped. As I said before I often felt like a therapist and it was draining.

The other thing that started to get to me was the way women would put me on a pedestal. I didn’t feel like I deserved that. I was doing my job, that they paid me for, and being a decent human being. I don’t feel that I am special.

I am very grateful to Roman for sharing his experiences. I hope that you guys enjoy it as well.

Friday Flashback – Footy Practice

Another gem from the vault of Erotic Adventures material I have been working through.

People think I am crazy going with Johnno to footy practice every week. My friends never miss an opportunity to give me a hard time about being such a dutiful girlfriend.

“Nothing would make me want to sit there in the cold while Nev runs around with his mates like a yobbo idiot,” my friend Liz once said.

The truth is that I don’t actually mind the cold and Johnno’s team seems to be blessed with some amazing talent. I’m not talking about how they play either. There is something about AFL players; tall, athletic, well muscled and somehow graceful when they play.

St Kilda Saints: 2019 fixtures, preview, list changes, every ...

So I wear my warmest jacket and spend a couple of lust filled hours sitting on the bleachers watching the big men fly. My mind is filled with thoughts about how their bodies would feel against mine. Johnno loves that I go with him. His mates think that he has the perfect girlfriend.

The real reward for sitting through two hours of practice comes at the end of the night when the team hits the showers. Jake always takes me to shower with him,

“You need to warm back up again babe,” he says.

We take the shower down the end a little away from the other ones and stand naked together under the steaming water. As the strong jets from the shower sting my skin I look around at the fit naked men, dressing, showering or standing around talking.

There is something about watching water cascading down the back of a guy standing in the shower. His shoulder muscles bunch as he washes himself and the water pours down his spine to trickle over his neat rounded butt. When I look at things like that my hands itch to reach out and cup those perfect globes.

Johnno loves watching me perv at his mates. Sometimes I walk around the room touching firm backs and round butts and enjoying them caressing me. Watching this gives Johnno a massive hard on.

He knows what I like in a guy and occasionally he nods quietly at a nice specimen that I have been eying off. The chosen one will stroll casually over to our little corner to join us. Usually they can’t take their eyes off me as they walk over. Watching their cock grow, I can feel my nipples tighten and stand up and the juices flow between my legs.

Usually the Chosen One will lift me up and hold me against the cold tiles on the wall as he thrusts his throbbing cock into me. I wrap my legs around his waist and dig my nails into his shoulders as I moan in pleasure. Over his shoulder I can see Johnno watching us, his cock is huge but his hands are clenched by his side as he resists the urge to stroke himself.

Around the room other guys don’t resist. All eyes are on the back of my suitor as he pumps into me. Sometimes I lock eyes with one of the watchers staring at him as he wanks and I get fucked against the wall.

It is always over quickly. The Chosen One moves away quickly. Johnno is desperate for me now. We throw our clothes on and race out to the car park. Sometimes he is so horny he fucks me on the bonnet of his car. Sometimes we make it half way home and end up screwing in the back of the car while it is parked on the side of the road.

The best times are when we do make it all the way home and he makes me scream all night.

And people wonder why I like going to practice.