1. If you had to lick a stranger’s sweaty armpit everyday for the rest of your life to save the life of your significant other would you do it? (Thank you Master of None).
Mr Jones thinks this is a stupid question. His response? Of course!! I don’t want Gemma to die! My response? EEEEWWW but of course I don’t want him to die either.
2. What is something you escaped from?
Many years ago I was in a job that I really loved for a long time. After I returned to work from my second round of maternity leave the management team had undergone a huge restructure and things were very different. Being stubborn I refused to see the writing on the wall and got into a very nasty situation with my manager. In the end things got really bad and I left the industry completely. It turned out to be one of the best things I could have done because it gave me the opportunity to do some amazing things with my family.
3. Have you ever done an Escape Room game with strangers? Did you solve it and get out on time?
I have not had the chance to try an escape room with anyone stranger or otherwise.
4. What is the strangest/craziest DM you have received?
I always struggle to answer this type of question. I know I get weird messages from people a lot of the time but I mostly delete them and move on. I think the ones that make me sit back with my eyebrows up are men requesting to be dominated.
I don’t have a problem with dominating men per se but a DM from a stranger that reads, “hey you look hot would you like to peg my arse?” Is a bit much for a first introduction.
5. Do you DM strangers? Why?
On the dating app I use, yes. That is how those apps work. If you are signed up and get all precious because a stranger sent you a message you have much bigger problems!
On regular social media, no. If we have interacted in a group or something like that then we aren’t really strangers anymore.
1. Your first night out after covid19 lock-down and you catch a friend making a drunken pass at your significant other. Which of the following most mirrors your feelings or thoughts?
a. Ignore it, they are drunk off their ass. b. Alcohol is a truth serum, true feelings come out and this false friend is after my honey. c. Well, my babe is pretty hot so I can’t blame them for making a move. d. After a year of lock-down, people are likely to flirt with a lamp-post. It is no big deal. e. Hmmm, I wonder if this friend is up for a threesome?
The response to this question depends on a lot of factors. If we are at lifestyle event then my response would wander between c and e depending on how attracted I was to her.
If it was a vanilla event then I would be firmly at c. Mr Jones has dated women from our vanilla life before. He had a great time and it was very validating for him. I was not as enthused about the relationship and had to put her in her place a couple of times. For the record we are still polite to each other but the situation kind of killed any friendship she and I had.
2. True or False. I am so bored with vanilla sex?
Well who wouldn’t be? The only time vanilla is valid is when you are eating ice cream
3. Is it unreasonable to hope for mind-blowing sex when you have been together for several years?
Erm No! It is unreasonable to expect mind blowing sex every day in any kind of relationship but there should be mind blowing sex some times. I am very spoiled. I get to have sex with multiple partners and generally that turns out pretty mind blowing but there are still times when Mr Jones and I get it together pretty well.
4. Name two things that could doom your current romantic relationship?
We have been together for 22 years. I am not sure there is much that could kill it now. The only things that I can think of that would kill our marriage are things that I can’t possibly imagine Mr Jones ever doing. The kinds of things that are likely to cause a problem are the little things that erode trust over time. Those things are hard to identify.
5. A local sex educator is holding orgasm classes–as in how to give an orgasm. Would you sign up to be a student or be the demonstration model?
I clicked the link and I don’t really get it. But for the record I celebrated the day by having breakfast, climbing a mountain, and spending the rest of the afternoon lounging, and writing my TMI post of course!!!. I will be making dinner and Mr Jones will be washing the dishes.
Bonus Bonus: A shot taken from the top of said mountain
To see who else is sharing their dirty dishes this week click on the button below
An ideal weekend would consist of some serious play time that included about two hours of continuous sex of some form, a large portion would involve fucking. Some time spent on the boat in a sunny part of Moreton Bay being at least semi naked in the sun and time to sleep and recover from the fucking.
2. What is the craziest job you would consider taking?
There are many people in the world who think I am crazy for doing the job I do now. Although I find it mostly rewarding. Despite frequent rants about troublesome students and Central Leadership making stupid unrealistic demands.
Apart from this job the craziest job I have considered was working as a scientist for the summer season in Antarctica. I was much younger then. I didn’t get very far through the application process before I realised it probably wasn’t for me.
3. Where would you rate yourself as a kisser on a scale of 1 to 10? (10 being the best kisser ever!)
I am OK at kissing. I wouldn’t call myself great so maybe a 6 or 7. A play friend I knew once had this feedback system going where you gave him a rating about certain skills he felt were important. Maybe I should start something like that.
4. What do you like most and least about your significant other’s cooking?
The think I like most about Mr Jones’ cooking is that when he does it I don’t have to. Don’t get me wrong, I generally LIKE cooking. What I don’t like is having to think about WHAT to cook after a day of work and having to plan what I need to buy to do said cooking.
What do I like least about Mr Jones cooking? That when it is his turn to cook I often end up doing the planning and decision making that is the part I don’t like about having to cook myself.
5. How has smartphone photography changed your world?
I am not sure if smartphone photography changed my world a lot. Certainly during the early years of my marraige and parenthood a physical camera was a big part of my life. Since having a smartphone I did move away from needing a separate item just to take photos.
A hiking trip that involved rock hopping accross a creek and a swim for my phone has convinced me that for our current, water based, adventure that I would invest in a waterproof camera. I do not regret my choice but I do still use my phone.
Bonus: What is a good life?
To me a good life is one that has been well lived. In doing this a person has achieved their goals, and been happy and productive. I don’t believe a person can be productive if they have not contributed to making the world a better place. Just accumulating stuff or satisfying your personal whims is not enough.
This post is part of this week’s TMI Tuesday. To see who else is sharing click on the icon below.
1 For you, what would be the worst store to have a $1000 gift card for?
Any of them!!! I can’t think of a single store I would like to spend $1000 in! At Christmas gift cards are the bane of our existence. Our whole family is very bad at using them. When certain department stores had a time limit on them we would frequently not use them and have to throw them out! I guess at heart I am a simple creature with simple tastes and I like to keep my ‘stuff’ to a minimum.
2. Besides a raise or more vacation time, what is the best perk a company can offer you?
A free canteen. Imagine being able to rock up and be served a healthy lunch without having to plan, prepare and then queue for the microwave to heat or toaster oven to toast said lunch!
3. What are you most likely to be very wrong about?
I don’t understand this question. I mean how could I ever be wrong about anything? I am never wrong.
4. What is something you borrowed but never gave back?
Sperm in a condom. Something Mr Jones likes to put on my chest when we have reconnecting sex after I have been with a lover. For a long time this was something we didn’t really discuss. But these days it seems this kind of thing seems more acceptable. What is interesting is the reaction of different men. Some feel they are done with it so why not? Some think it is hot that in some way they continue to be interacting with me sexually. One notable exception was a man who thought it was taking a piece of him and violating it.
Bonus: What is something you have struggled with your entire life?
I have always struggled with my weight / amount that I eat. I realise now that when I was a child / teenager I THOUGHT I was fat and ate too much because of what my mother told me. Who the hell tells a six year old that they are fat?? These days I am kinder with myself but I still think about how much I eat and if it is right every day.
There is always room for boobs
This post is part of this week’s TMI Tuesday roundup. Click on the image below to see who else is sharing!
This story was posted on Erotic Adventures in 2013. As I re-read it I remembered a woman I knew once who had amazing nipples.
Clive sat at the edge of the stage watching the girl gyrating in front of him. A large crowd of admirers tried to get her attention. Clive did not want to be one of the crowd. He sat back patiently, waiting, watching. He wasn’t interested in her dance moves or, the long honey brown perfection of her legs. The perfect shape of her waist or the smooth round globes of her arse held no allure to him. He had come to see one thing and he would wait, knowing that his patience would be rewarded.
The girl strutted across the stage moving her hips seductively. When she reached Clive, she bent down towards him pressing her arms together to display a deep cleavage. From where he sat Clive could see the smooth skin of her breasts but her costume covered the part he was most interested in. He resisted the temptation to lean forward in an attempt to glimpse what he had come to see. Experience had taught him that his patience would be rewarded and that the waiting would make the moment that much sweeter. The lace of her outfit stretched over her breasts but Clive could see the swelling at the centre of the perfect globes. His pants tightened as he gazed hungrily at the little divot. His fingers twitched at the thought of caressing it. Then she was gone, writhing across the stage displaying her body to the other desperate, horny men waiting lustfully at the edge of the stage.
The dance wore on, Clive waited, he knew that he would soon get his opportunity. She reached up and unclasped the back of her costume. For Clive time slowed. His heart began to thump against his chest as he watched every move intently. Slowly she moved towards him holding her top in place, covering the objects of his desire. When she was standing directly in front of him she let the scrap of lace fall in front of him. For a moment he was distracted by the shiny fabric but only for a moment. He looked upwards, letting his eyes travel over her flat belly to the perfect round globes on her chest. Then he saw what he had been waiting for, her nipples.
The small pink nodes stood out proudly like the crowning glory on her breasts. Clive sighed in rapture. Some people travelled half way around the world to see famous paintings, he felt the same way about nipples. The girl bent down in front of him cupping her breasts with both hands. Clive’s zipper strained as she flexed her fingers sliding them upwards over the white skin towards her nipples. As she pinched their pink perfectness into little peaks Clive almost whimpered. He clenched his hands to stop himself from reaching up to touch her in awe. His cock throbbed as she moved her breasts from side to side in front of his face, teasing and tantalising him. Without glancing away for a second he reached down and extracted a bill from his pocket and passed it to her. She took it from him with a smile not showing her surprise at the denomination.
For a moment she remained, holding her nipples between her thumbs and forefingers tantalising him even further before she gyrated away to pay attention to the other punters. The spell was broken and Clive sat back in his chair breathing heavily. He felt as if he had just had sex. His cock subsided but he knew that the slightest thought of those perfect pink nipples would have his cock at attention almost immediately.
He made his way to the bar and bought another drink. The girl behind the bar smiled at him warmly as she made his drink. Automatically his eyes dropped to her chest, taking in the way the thin fabric of her t-shirt stretched across her breasts as if it were straining to contain them. Her nipples poked against the fabric tantalising him as she served his drink.
“Hello Clive,” a familiar voice greeted him. He turned to see Dolly, a tiny Asian woman standing in the bar arm in arm with the girl who had just danced. “This is Nadia. Would you like to get to know her a little more intimately?”
Clive smiled, Dolly knew him too well. He nodded and Dolly led the way to the private rooms at the side of the club. She held the door open for him and he stepped inside to take his seat on the small couch in the corner. Dolly flicked a switch and seductive music filled the small space. Taking the lead Dolly strutted in front of him, rubbing her hands over her tiny, perfectly round breasts caressing her nipples through the fabric of her dress. Clive was mesmerised as her fingers moved around and up and down. She reached up and slid a strap down over her shoulder watching Clive’s face as she did so. Nadia joined in and Clive found himself torn between the two women. He ached to see Dolly’s long, brown nipples but the pert pinkness of Nadia was like a drop of honey waiting for him to lick.
Dolly slid her arms out of her dress and pushed the fabric of her dress down towards her waist. Her breasts sat out proudly in front Clive’s face, the perfect brown nipples tantalisingly close to his lips. Nadia followed suit, exposing the perfect rosebud pink aureola of her full round breasts. The two women stood breast to breast in front of him, caressing each other. Clive felt as if he was going to burst his zip. He reached down and stroked himself aching to ease the need he felt.
In front of him the two women embraced, Dolly’sbrown nipples, caressed Nadia’s baby pink ones. Clive’s cock ached and his breath was coming in gasps as he watched the two sets of nipples mash against each other. Wickedly Dolly moved closer holding her breasts close to his face. Her eyes glittered with excitement.
“Show me how turned on you are right now,” her voice was hoarse with desire.
Obediently Clive unzipped his jeans and freed his aching cock. Dolly’s eyes widened with desire. She sat on the couch beside him and lifted her dress up over her thighs. Her hand reached down to her smoothly shaven pussy as her other and teased her nipple. Clive began to stroke himself, never taking his eyes off Dolly’snipples. He didn’t even notice Nadia kneel in front of Dolly and press her face between her legs. The room filled with the scent of arousal. The strong musky smell of pussy juice assaulted Clive’s nostrils as he stroked himself harder. Dolly held her nipple out for him. He didn’t need a second invitation. He leant down and took the hard node between his lips biting down gently, just the way he knew she liked. His hand was almost a blur shuffling up and down his cock as Dolly moaned her pleasure.
Dolly’s body spasmed in ecstasy and her sharp cry of pleasure filled the room. Hot white cum covered Clive’s hand as he grunted in pleasure. Nadia stood up and smiled down at the two of them. Drunkenly Clive reached out and handed her a wad of bills.
“Thank you,” his voice was weak.
“My pleasure,” purred Dolly, trying unsuccessfully to hide her greedy glance at the cash. “I look forward to seeing you again soon.” And then they were gone, strutting out of the room leaving Clive poorer but well satisfied.
I have spent the last eight weeks exploring our new catamaran while sailing isn’t exactly a new thing for us owning something like this definitely is. For me committing to being a crew member with expected roles and responsibilities is also something new. I am learning it is good.
I also tried a new lover recently. You can read about the highlights of that encounter here.
2.Who do you sometimes compare yourself to?
Everyone! Which is sad and not healthy. If another teacher talks about a classroom practice I internally ask myself, Should I do that? Do I do that? Is my class as good as theirs? It can be demoralising .
3.What gets you excited about life?
I am a biologist at heart. I love LIFE in the biological sense. I love looking at living things and marvelling at the way life is layered and interlocking all over this world of ours. Spending time in marine environments especially mangroves is a great way to see this. In one little space you can see mangrove trees with oysters attached to them, baby fish sheltering in their roots, crabs crawling about foraging in their shade, birds looking for their breakfast and a whole plethora of insects. Life crammed together.
4.Are you satisfied with your work?
Mostly yes. Even though sometimes listening to my complaints it may not seem so. When I consider retiring I am immediately reminded that I am not ready for that yet. Although it does seem tempting sometimes. Like everything in this world the rare moments of triumph make up for the daily grind.
5.What have people most often praised you for?
Lovers, admire my boobs, more specifically my nipples. I have a friend who thinks they are the most perfect boobs he has ever seen. I have tried to send unflattering pictures to him but he insists that the angle never matters.
Bonus: When you think of home, what immediately comes to mind?
When I am away from home I often think about my bed. There is nothing like your own bed. I have friends who are FIFO workers. They have a different room and bed every shift rotation. I don’t understand how they cope with that. I just couldn’t.
This post is part of this week’s TMI Tuesday. Click on the image below to see who else is sharing this week.
1.First question relates to the photo above – what is it?
When I looked at this image I could see immediately what it is; a salmon steak. I can’t understand why other people would find it confusing. I guess it is like those puzzles where the image is hidden. Once you see the image you can’t un see it.
2.Should we be signalling our existence to alien life? Why?
As everyone knows the Earth is merely a super computer designed by Deep Thought, pictured below. The current version of Earth was built on the planet Magrathea to replace the original Earth which was destroyed by Vogons minutes before it finished its calculations. So the above question is really irrelevant. Just ask Douglas Adams
3.What is one thing you do not understand about yourself?
I don’t understand why I backflip over so many things. For example I was always firm about my reluctance to go on an extended sailing trip but then I actively encouraged Mr Jones to buy his dream boat and embark on such a journey.
Another example; I have always said I wouldn’t fuck someone who was young enough to be my child. And now I am dancing around that topic with a very young man.
4. What weird food combinations do you really enjoy?
I am Australian so anything with Vegemite is considered normal for us but weird in the rest of the world. My go to Vegemite combinations are; with smashed avocado on toast, on a salad sandwhich.
Other combinations that are not so common are peanut paste (butter) with honey and McDonalds fries with their soft serve.
5. What are two of your go-to strategies to help you make decisions?
First one that I use for the really big decisions is to physically write a list of the pros and cons. It is important to make a physical list because that helps you to get clarity on which side is actually the stronger side. Also it helps you to really hone in on what is important to you about the decision.
Second one is to avoid making the decision until I absolutely have to and then making the decision based on a gut feeling at the last minute. This strategy isn’t great for life decisions but great for ordering food at restaurants. Also great for deciding less important things in the classroom like if we are going to play a game.
Bonus: How replaceable are you?
Everyone is replaceable despite what they would like to think of themselves. As a teacher I am completely replaceable. There are hundreds of other teachers out there and most of them will do as good a job as me. As a mother probably a little less so. I like to think my parenting style is pretty good and my children have always been reluctant to spend too much time in other houses because the dynamics are too turbulent and unpredictable.
Bonus Bonus: Because there were not enough boobs in this post here are some with the beach on Moreton Island in the background.
This post is part of TMI Tuesday for this week. To see who else is sharing click here or on the image below
In all honesty seduction is not the main territory of either gender. There are some people who are naturally seductive. There are some who are naturally able to invite seduction and there are some who are more comfortable pursuing others.
2. Which of the following statements most closely matches your sexual attitude?
a. Sex is best when you focus on your own pleasure. b. Sex is best when I can totally meld with my partner and feel as one. c. Sex is best when the purpose is that of conceiving a child. d. Sex is just a behavior; don’t put too much importance on the act, just do it the way you like and need.
I am going with a. but with some slight modifications. My natural instinct is to please. I often find myself trying to make others happy at my own expense. As I grow older I am making an effort to change this and focus on my own pleasure. This cannot be a completely selfish enterprise. Like many I get pleasure from seeing other’s pleasure. So while I am thinking about myself I still need to think about the other people in the room as well.
3. Do you need to feel emotionally connected to enjoy sex with another person?
In line with my answer to 2. There has to be some kind of connection. It doesn’t have to be a romantic connection but there has to be some kind of mental connection. There is a moment when you meet someone that usually happens around the first tentative touch. If there isn’t some kind of electricity when that happens then it is unlikely that the sex will be good.
If that first hesitant moment when our fingers touch feels sexy then it is on like Donkey Kong baby!
4. Are you allowed to be sexual? Explain.
The short answer is yes. The longer answer is of course there are times when I have to behave myself. The irony of this is that my efforts to keep Gemma a secret from the Pearl Clutching Crew (thank you Free Matt) I can often come across as a bit of a prude. Well at least that is how I see it. Maybe I am not as clever as I think.
5. Agree or Disagree. Sex without love is meaningless.
I have posted before about the way that women are programmed to be non-monogamous because they need the protection of a beta but want the genes of an Alpha for their offspring. In my opinion this is a biological thing which we cannot avoid. Because of this, the aftermath of sex is a concoction of hormones that are designed to trick us into thinking we are in love.
Of course it is more complicated than that. Humans are like Bonobo apes. We use sex as a social tool as well as a reproductive strategy. Sex between humans creates a bond that gives status (marriage). Bonobos also use sexual interaction to cement status and social structure.
Just to make it more complex I believe that there are many types of love that can be reflected with sex. Not just the monogamous marriage type. But I think I will leave that for another post.
Bonus: Conventional wisdom (but not research) says that women value monogamy more.
Christianity has pushed the idea of monogamy for millennia as a way of controlling the power of women. In Bonobo society females dominate males. The Christian Church has removed this tendency from humans. Additionally men have used property and wealth to control women making monogamy and sexual purity a matter of survival for women throughout history.
So in terms of sexuality monogamy is not important but historically a non-monogamous woman was definitely going to have a much harder time just getting by.
Bonus Bonus: For getting through all that intellectual stuff your reward is Christmas boobies
Before I start this edition of TMI I just want to say that even though I wrote the questions I didn’t realise that it would turn into a so many opportunities to post photos. Not that I think most of you will mind.
1. Which part of your body do you think is the most sexy? Post a pic if you dare.
Ok so I like my boobs. Most people who see them in real life tend to agree. I have an awesome friend who did a photo shoot of me recently and I have shared a few of the shots here but I will do so again happily. Apologies if you have seen some of these before. I really need to have another session with my friend.
2. Which part of your partner’s body do you find the most sexy. Tell us about the time you first saw it.
I am a sucker for a great ass. It is one of the things about Mr Jones that I have always liked even as his body changed over the 23 years we have been together. This is quite an old photo but it honestly looks the same today as it did then.
3. Are you a fan of lingerie on yourself? Or on someone else?
Mr Jones is not really in to lingerie. Consequently my collection is relatively small. As I aged and my body changed I felt less confident to wear lacy things. Over my time as a swinger but more recently at my previous pole studio I have had experiences and seen myself in many different angles. I have become more comfortable with myself and will wear a bunch of things I never would have before. My lingerie collection these days includes a few bra and panty sets but other things like body stockings and sexy bodysuits.
4. “Fifty Shades of Grey”– Work of genius or complete twaddle?
I was interested to read Cyndi from Moondance Pages’ take on this. I have never been a fan of Fifty Shades the book, mainly because I just can’t stomach the “Knight in shining armour rescues the damsel” storyline. Having said that I did really like the first movie. Mainly because the look and feel of it was so sexy.
It obviously isn’t complete twaddle or no-one would have wanted to read it. I definitely wouldn’t put it in the complete genius category either. Complete genius is something that is completely unlike anything else. To be regarded as a genius in my eyes is to conceive something that is unlike anything written before.
5. Would you rather listen to a sexy voice telling you what is happening or watch a sex scene on mute?
Watching is probably more my go to. If I watch porn, very occasionally, it is on mute. I often find sexy talk distracting when I have sex. Although there are some stand out sexy talk moments in my history. One of them is a long term friend who is firmly out of reach right now thanks to Covid and his insistence that Sydney is a much better place to live!!! One of the first times I sucked his cock he put his hand on the back of my head and whispered to me what a good girl I was.
Remembering that still gives me a twinge.
Bonus: Tell us about a time you experimented with a fantasy and it did not go according to plan.
This one time … (at band camp) …
Sorry I couldn’t help myself.
So once Mr Jones tried to organise a surprise for my birthday. He contacted several men we knew and arranged for them to visit me. I was completely unaware of the plan. On the night he tied me and blindfolded me and then I was “visited” over several intervals. There were pauses in between and there was no speaking. At the time it was fun but a little confusing. I knew each “visitor” was him but I didn’t know what he was trying to do.
It turned out that our “friends” had all pulled out and he was left manning the fort alone. He had organised baby sitters and we had the house completely to ourselves. This was not something that happened often so he didn’t want to completely waste the opportunity.
This post is part of this week’s TMI Tuesday. To see who else is sharing click here. Or on the image below.
Welcome to this week’s TMI Tuesday. As usual please visit TMI Tuesday to check out the other contributions. But only after you read mine first!
1. Favorite form of adult pajamas: Kimono, soft pant, romper or Winnie-the-pooh style?
I only became a pajama wearer recently. I sleep naked and have since I was in my early twenties. Consequently I never really saw the point of spending money on pajamas. On an outlet shopping expedition I bought my first pair of Peter Alexander pajama pants. It has changed my whole outlook on pajamas. If I worked from home I would live in those babies!!
I think I need a new pair soon though.
2. What time do you wake-up in the morning?
During term time my alarm goes off at 5.30am. It is a struggle to get up at that time but it is necessary if I am going to even have a hope of getting something on these pages and retain my sanity.
When school is out I usually get up around 7am. Sometimes earlier in summer. Despite taking medication that is supposed to help with my circadian rhythms insomnia seems to be part of my regular sleep landscape these days so a regular sleep cycle seems to be impossible to achieve.
3. Your favorite chore to do is _____ .
Washing clothes. There is something about hanging them all on the line neatly and then folding them. I feel as if I have achieved something with my day if I have done a few loads of laundry.
4. Least favorite chore to do is _____ . Why?
Cleaning dishes. It is messy and wet and it seems like as soon as you get that sink clean and empty there is something else sitting there. A completely endless, thankless task!!
5. Tell us about a home-cooked meal that you cannot forget.
When our children were younger we often went camping with a group of families. It was the practice on these trips to share meals. Each family would be responsible for cooking one meal or alternatively we would all contribute something to the meal. One of the group members was quite good at camp oven cooking. There is something very special about food that has been cooked on the coals. Particularly when you are balancing your plate on your lap around a fire.
Bonus: Is tired the new norm?
I don’t think tired is the new norm but having a mental health issue definitely seems to be something that is more prevalent than it was about 10 years ago. It seems that everywhere I turn people are identifying as having a mental health problem.
Another disturbing thing that is perhaps linked to the above is the overwhelming number of people who are more interested in constant scrolling and consumption of rubbish content created by their internet interests stopping only to perhaps create some substandard content of their own using an app that basically does it for you. No one is interested in putting in the effort to create something completely original with their own minds and hands.
OK that maybe was a bit of a rant. I apologise.
Bonus Bonus: Due to the lack of sexy content today here are some boobs
Remember to click the link and enjoy some other bloggers