TMI Tuesday – Post Christmas Limbo

1. Would you rather live in a real haunted house or a gingerbread house?

In the story Hansel and Gretel manage to overpower the witch to escape. Plus who wouldn’t love to live in a house that is that tasty.

2. One practical use for your belly button is _____ .

Photo by Shoeb Khatib on Unsplash

As a shot glass. Having a very sexy cuban drinking cuban rum from my belly button was one of the sexiest things I have done.

3. Do you trust birds? If not, why not?

Our house is a place where birds seem to come when they have no home or have been rejected from their home. My rainbow lorikeet was re-homed with us when his original owner could no longer keep him. We have several chickens and geese that also came to us because their previous owners were not able to keep them. The most recent resident in our house is a darling little blue budgie who flew into our yard being attacked by other wild birds. Despite our efforts we could not find his owners. He has repaid our kindness by singing his little heart out every morning.

4. What’s wrong with you?

Way back when I turned 40 I was diagnosed with hypertension. At the time I felt cheated by my body and by the passing of time. A few months after my 50th birthday I was diagnosed with osteo arthritis, another disease of old age.

5. Would you rather be a millionaire but NOT have friends or family or be broke but have friends and family?

This seems like such a cliche choice. As much as I find people draining and sometimes downright annoying I would rather have special people than money.

The Best Christmas Present

My favourite story of the last week is of a friend who was out for an evening at the theatre with her daughter and a long term family friend. The family friend was a middle aged lady who was always very properly dressed and made up and was the kind of person who always encouraged proper manners. As my friend navigated the car park she managed to snag a parking space right next to the elevators. To the astonishment of my friend and her daughter the very proper lady they had known for many years turned to my friend and said,

“Fucking awesome park Mandy!”

She then proceeded to get out of the car as if nothing unusual had happened. My friend and her daughter took a while to digest this and followed suit. To this day whenever they are together and they get a great parking space Mandy’s daughter will say “fucking awesome park Mandy!”

It seems that the lady had a realisation in her mid life that she just really loved saying fuck. She told my friend that it had become one of her favourite words. She loved the way it seemed to roll off her tongue. No doubt she also loved the look on people’s faces when she said it.

Fuck is a word I have been familiar with most of my life. I grew up on a farm. My brothers and I learned very early on that some words were OK for outside but not inside. Consequently I have learned to regulate my use of this word to suitable audiences. Interestingly the school where I currently work is less precious about the use of this word. Tradesmen use it a lot so we accept that Young People studying to be tradesmen are going to use it as well. I probably say it more often than most of the other teachers but honestly if I am going to listen to other people saying it all day then it is going to be coming out of my mouth. And like Mandy’s friend it just rolls of my tongue.

Clearly #1 Son thinks I like it because he saw this cushion at a market and decided he needed to buy it as a Christmas present for me. My mother did not really approve but she can go fuck herself.

TMI Tuesday – Ghosts of Christmas

1. Would you rather work on Christmas day and earn 4 times your daily salary or spend the day with your family?

For a large part of my working life I worked in the food manufacturing industry. Not surprisingly Christmas is a dominating factor in almost every type of food manufacture. For some reason people think they need to purchase a ridiculous amount of food and stores think that factories can just double their production over night. The flip side of this is that in the days following Christmas people realise that they have more food than they need and stores stop stocking most products, consequently expecting manufacturers to turn off the production tap just as quickly as it was turned on.

This phenomenon is OK if you make a product that has a long shelf life like biscuits or pasta but if your business is anything to do with fresh produce it is hell on legs. Any farmer will laugh at you if you suggest to get cows to increase production overnight or chickens to lay an extra egg or two just for the month of December. Just as they will laugh at you if you ask them to turn their production off on the 26 December.

So would I work on Christmas for four times my salary? There has been times when I had to and I certainly didn’t get paid four times my salary. I am certain all the doctors and nurses in hospitals all around the world also don’t get that choice.

2. Would you rather spend a snowy day outside playing winter games/sports or spend a snowy day inside with your most annoying relative?

As I explained in my last TMI post snow is a once in a lifetime experience for the vast majority of Australians. Unless you are into skiing and even then you wouldn’t be skiing every year. So my annoying relative can go to hell. I am making snow angels and snow men.

3. For the month of December would you rather sing jingle bells really loud every time you enter a room or wear a Santa suit every day?

I love getting into the Christmas Spirit by wearing a really crappy Christmas T-shirt. I actually own several, along with a selection of Christmas earrings, headwear and a few Christmas print dresses. So Santa suit please, although there better be air conditioning.

4. Would you rather choose your presents or be surprised?

The IDEA of being surprised is appealing but of course in that fantasy the giver of the gift has great insight and gives a gift that is perfect. The reality is slightly different. As a person who is extremely conscious of the amount of STUFF we humans seem to accumulate I would rather receive a gift I have a use for.

5. Would you rather be Scrooge before he meets the ghost of Christmas or be the Grinch before becoming good?

I would rather be Scrooge. Even though he was a grumpy old man who would’t let his employees have a day off he didn’t actively try to sabotage the whole day. Today I am dealing with a bit of joint pain and I am feeling a bit like Scrooge.

Bonus: Everyone loves boobies

I have probably posted this before but who doesn’t love a pair of novelty Christmas nipple hats.

TMI Tuesday The Christmas Edition

Source SBS

1. Would you rather have a cold December holiday season or a warm holiday season?

Like a lot of people in the world I have never experienced the opposite of what my local climate has to offer. I know that many Australians choose to holiday in a colder northern hemisphere country just to have the experience of a Christmas that looks like a Christmas card but I am not one of them, yet. In all honesty I don’t think I would specifically travel overseas just to have a white Christmas. While it is frustrating to see snow and Northern Hemisphere based images everywhere when it is 30 degrees outside I would rather have seafood and salad for lunch on Christmas Day than a roast.

2. Would you rather help Santa deliver presents or help Santa in his workshop?

I am a creator. Nothing makes me happier than making things with my hands. Food, clothes, stories. Definitely an elf in Santa’s workshop.

3. Would you rather wear nice clothes all Christmas day or wear pajamas?

In line with the weather the standard dress for Christmas Day is a cheesy Christmas t-shirt and shorts. No shoes. Or swimmers if you are spending the day in the pool or at the beach. Nice clothes are uncomfortable, basically because they are hot. As a child, I loved the feeling of getting home after church and taking those damned “nice clothes” off.

4. Would you rather eat fruit cake for two days straight or eat candy canes for two days straight?

I don’t think Australians get candy canes right. I am sure they don’t. If they do I REALLY don’t understand the fuss. Fruit cake is a much better option.

5. Right now would you rather eat gingerbread cookies or drink hot chocolate?

Again. Hot, sweaty, humidity. We had several storms last night so now that the sun is out it is going to get steamy. So gingerbread with cold milk or even iced tea sounds delightful.

This post is part of this week’s TMI Tuesday. If you would like to read more TMI goodness click on the button below

TMI Tuesday – Relationships and Attention

1. Compared to 5 years ago do you care more or less about what people think of you?

I would like to say less. The reality is probably that it hasn’t really changed. I still have a pathological need to gain people’s approval

2. What is the last self-help book, article or blog post you read? Did it help you?

In the early hours of this morning I was preparing a blog post and I delved into articles about narcissistic parents and the effects on their children. It was somewhat helpful to explain the behaviour of my own parent which hasn’t always been exemplary but I guess we all have failings. The thing I am coming to realise is that while you may have a reason for your failing I don’t have an obligation to accept behaviour from you that is damaging to me. There is a reason that the word toxic is used to describe certain people.

3. Tell us 3 people you must have in your life.

Mr Jones because he is Mr Jones. I like to think sometimes that I could manage without him but I really honestly couldn’t.

The Unicorn because if there was a mini me in the world it is her.

I don’t have a third person.

4. Does tech interfere with your personal relationships? How so?

I think that tech interferes with living in general. Spending endless hours with your head down scrolling and scrolling. When can you get that time back. How can you connect when you are so stimulated that your brain doesn’t relax into existing?

5. When you want your partner or friend’s undivided attention, how do you communicate that?

Depends on the friend but I find putting my body directly in their line of sight so that they can’t ignore me works well. This applies for teenagers who don’t want to listen to an instruction, children who are fixated on a television and husbands who haven’t noticed you in a while.

Bonus: What is your view of love?

TMI Tuesday Because You Can Never Have Too Much TMI

Yes this is the second instalment for today. You have to ride the motivation when it takes you.

1. Who here plays Wordle? Have you every solved wordle in one play?

Sometimes, and no. I like word games like Bananagrams and Scrabble but when I am idling on my phone Wordle doesn’t just tick my boxes.

2. Any Candy Crush addicts?

I used to be. I just got a bit bored with it. I still have the app on my phone though.

3. Anyone still engaging in Angry Birds fighting?

Wow I suck at these questions!

4. Do you Sudoku?

I actually do enjoy a good sudoku. I have giant book of them that I work on when I am out sailing. Another crazy puzzle in the same book is Kakuro. Addictive and frustrating.

5. Have you ever done an Escape Room? Did you like it?

I haven’t had the opportunity but there is one that is near me. The Unicorn went there with her friend and thoroughly enjoyed it. I am thinking I might drag Mr Jones along.

6. Are jigsaw puzzles your jam? How many pieces was the last jigsaw puzzle you did? What was the largest jigsaw puzzle you completed?

I really do like a good jigsaw. If only they didn’t take up so much space. The largest one we have ever done as a family was 1500 pieces. It took us a while!

Bonus: Is your brain sexy? How so?

Yes. Because being smart is sexy. Because being confident is sexy. Because thinking creatively about sex is sexy. Like this shot I took last night while doing my flexibility training.

Feeling Human

The last month has been a whirlwind of socialising planning large events, hosting the large events and some work thrown in for good measure. As I posted about way back in August, (was it that long ago?) I have been struggling to get the focus to write. Which is a little frustrating. I hate the idea that I have spent so much time building something up and now it is slipping away.

Part of the struggle is this ridiculous amount of socialising and human interaction. Which is draining. I love having friends. I love having good conversations. If the good conversations lead to good sex then that is even better. But there comes a point when I need to take a break from people. As a classic introvert I need to recharge my internal battery by spending time by myself. This isn’t easy because I live with people but over time they have learned that I need quiet time.

To compound the situation my diet over the last few weeks has been crazy. Lots of take away and high calorie foods with a stupid amount of drinking. When I woke up to go to work for the start of Term 2 I felt like I was in the middle of a massive hangover. Not the headache and nausea part. Just the super tired and fuzzy head part. I took control of my diet a bit more this week and focussed on smaller amounts of cleaner food. Also on not drinking so much sugar. The first few days were hard. I am still feeling tired a lot of the time but that is the social batteries re-charging as well. For the most part I am feeling a little human again.

I have stories of sexy times to share I am hoping they will be forthcoming in the next few weeks.

TMI Tuesday – Better Late than Never

I seem to be doing a lot of this lately, starting a post and then not finishing it. Well in the spirit of slaying the demon that has been sitting on my chest here is last week’s TMI

1. What do you need most right now, a friend or a lover? Why?

Right now I don’t feel like I am in desperate need of either. I have Mr Jones. He is a good friend and a lifelong lover. This may sound cynical but my world seems to be full of people who would like to call themselves my friend but they are more interested in being there for the fun times than actually being a friend.

2. What song do you not know the lyrics of but you like to sing anyway?

So many but the one that springs to mind right now is Brittney Spears’ “Baby One More Time” I always sing “Show me how you want to do me” A much better lyric than “Show me how you want it to be”

3. Tell 3 things you recommend to watch on Youtube.

I really only use YouTube for school so my watch list is a bit weird. But here goes

Crash Course – A channel with educational videos for everyone

Bill Nye the Science Guy – The original show was released by Disney back in the day so the videos on YouTube are cut versions and the resolution is low but the kids like it mostly.

Adam Ruins Everything – This one isn’t really for school but it is worth a look.

4. What cartoon (include animated series) do you still watch?

I was never really a great watcher of cartoons. My access to any kind of non-educational television was limited when I was a child so I never really formed any kind of attachment to pop culture until I was an adult. The only cartoons that I really formed a connection with were the americanised Animes Astro Boy and G-Force.

5. Have you conquered one of your fears? What was it?

During my voyage last year I faced many fears. Some are hard to define but I felt I became a much braver person. Currently I am battling a fear of a particular pole move called a layback. It is challenging as I recently had a fall from this movement and it has shaken me. But I am working on it. Slowly.

Bonus: At this point in time, would you rather travel or focus on your career? Why?

At this point in time I am working because I am not ready to be fully retired but I don’t consider myself as focussing on a career. I am currently researching a potential trip to the United States in 2024 and also considering another voyage the following year. So I guess I am focussing on travel.

Bonus Bonus: Because boobs. And somewhere back in that post I talked about sailing.

Funky Undies and a Funky Shirt

Finally it is Friday. Lots of parts of my body hurt. The longer I am awake the more I discover. Who knew that using long dormant muscles would be so painful!. At least I have cute undies!

Despite feeling like I have made progress with my mental health it seems I am still treading water. Words still won’t flow even though I actually have ideas and half started pieces all over the place. My mind is still bouncing around all over the place. So you all will be subjected to posts like this. Brain dumps and snippets of my life.

Enjoy your Friday. Remember You Never Walk Alone even if it feels like it. Sometimes help is in unlikely places.

Friday on My Mind

Photo by Glenn Carstens-Peters on Unsplash

Back in June I participated in Every Damned Day in June. I learned that I just need to sit at the key board and post, something. And then… Life. Or rather motivation waned. Too many things competing for my attention. Writing is something that requires focus, and the absence of other things, mostly people, verbally usually, competing for my attention. That seems to be something of a rarity in this house. A couple of weeks ago I had a bit of a melt down, at work until I could get a lid on it. Then later at home. I likened it to having a pimple that needed to be squeezed. Just a build up of junk that had to come out.

Reflecting I know some of the things I said to some people who genuinely care about me were probably hard to deal with. The whole time I was spewing out my feeling junk I was painfully aware that this wasn’t their fault and that I was unloading in an unhealthy way. In the aftermath I reflected. I considered my options with mental health care. I don’t have a regular therapist. I have mostly avoided them for a few reasons, cost being one, the idea of unloading to a perfect stranger another. I did once visit a psychologist and he was somewhat helpful but the reality of mental health is that fixing the problem requires effort. When people speak of “doing work” at therapy they are not wrong.

So I didn’t find a therapist but I did find some answers. My social life has been awesomely busy. The kind that teenage me dreamed of. Adult me has come to the realisation that I am socially awkward and while partying every weekend SEEMS like fun it takes its toll. And so I realised I have to also plan to NOT go out. I have to plan to stay home and NOT visit people or invite friends over. I am an introvert at heart and I need to have some down time.

So here is to the weekend. To quiet times and maybe some writing.